I can’t let this decade go without a comment or two.
I have always been of the mind that at the end of something, in this case, a whole decade you must look back at the positives and negatives. Not to dwell on these things but to cast them off as experiences you have survived or enjoyed.
I think I have experienced these in equal measure.
But first the negatives, simply to get them over and done with:
-My husband getting cancer, an absolutely frightening thing for the whole family.
– my father and mentor dying, this was one of my biggest negatives. It took me a long time to acknowledge my grief.
-watching my mother deteriorate both physically and mentally.
-my father in law dying, a loving and kind man whom I miss .
– my beautiful old cats dying within a year of each other after close to twenty years in our lives.
– the rending apart from my siblings in a nasty way. Their choice not mine.
-my deteriorating health, and my realising time is short.
I have just realised that all of these big events were beyond my control and made my coping with them all the harder.
ok! Enough of that! I am for the most part an optimistic person and try not to dwell on the negatives for too long.
Now for the positives in this decade:
-my dear husband of nearly forty years, getting the all-clear from his stage 3 melanoma. He was put on this amazing drug which shrank the nasty growth and kept him safe.
– I’m eternally grateful for the new medicines discovered or invented that help loved ones survive.
– though sad, another positive was my mother going into high care. I found I could do no more for her in her home. Knowing that she has 24/7 care means I am not stressed for her.
– knowing that both my children are now healthy, happy and settled into their lives makes me happy.
-my decision to do university online, this has enhanced my life enormously and given me so much more confidence.
-my decision to go to the gym regularly each week. This has not only enhanced my health and stamina but has also introduced me to a new group of reprobates whom I admire and enjoy.
-Knowing that my longterm friends are always there when I need them.
– adding three new cats to our family. This made an exciting adjustment for all of us.
Right! So this decade I have learnt about two very different things that can either make my life easier or harder.
The first is that I can not control life, and not to fuss and worry over the fact that I can’t. I have learnt to stay calm and quiet and let the process of living happen. I am reminded about that poem or prayer.
The second, thing is that I have learnt this decade about being grateful for the things in my life and not hark after things I don’t need. Again the poem says it all.
So I say goodbye to 2010-2019 and look forward to this new decade with anticipation for my new adventures, whatever they might be.
KJS Writing 